Just in case you can’t until tomorrow, here it is! The Twitter Opera Taster…

ta da!!!! http://www.youtube.com/v/C7_GOVSGheI

So, the curtain has just fallen on the first full dress-rehearsal, composed to fabulous music by Helen Porter and Marc Teitler, and brought to life by mezzo soprano Hannah Pedley, starring as Helga/Esmerelda/Corbin, and baritone Andrew Slater who is bringing the characters of  William, Hans and Tobermory to life. The behatted narrator and ringmaster is Philip Herbert, the twinkly fingered repetiteur is Lindy Tennent-Brown, and the director is John Lloyd Davies. But aside from the creative team here, none of this could have happened without you – our lovely Twitterati.

We were packed to the rafters with international media this afternoon and some excerpts may be coming to a screen near you very soon. And if any of our Twitterers are in the Royal Opera House tomorrow, then please make yourselves known to the  Channel 4 news crew who will be filming the performance – because (oooh!) you could end up talking about it on the telly.

Ahead of tomorrow’s WORLD PREMIERE, the following is a sneaky peak of the libretto as it currently stands - and hold on to your hats as there’ll be a short film ready very soon, showing exclusive footage of this week’s lightening-speed workshops.  Bravo one and all…

Prologue

It is a curious story — hear my tale,

Although my name was never Ishmael,

For this great epic will your souls ignite,

Your senses ravish and your hearts deloitte…

A story written not by one, but all,

A composite composition to appal,

Of passion, burning revenge and envy bitter,

Among the gentle denizens of Twitter.

           *                  *                  *                  *

Think, when we speak of horses, that you saw them,

(Although in fact we couldn’t quite afford them),

The Duck of Destiny brings joys, betrayals, sins:

The Twitter Opera approaches — It Begins!

 An endless opera, infinite yet uncompleted,

The strangest tale that ever has been tweeted,

The strangest opera ever heard or sung,

This tragic tale of Twitterdämmerung…

(Impassioned dramatic overture 15”)

Prologue 2

Long ago, in a far-off galaxy,

a race of strange alien beings

filled the long winter evenings

at their computer terminals,

interfacing

like rabbits,

on social networking websites. 

They laboured to create a new artform,

of drama, music, love, revenge and birdseed,

sung by singers of enormous artistry

and weight,

a million contradictory plots

drawn from the dustbin

of the collective imagination.

Scene #1

Ringmaster (over underscoring)

One morning, very early, a man and a woman were standing,

arm-in-arm, in London’s Covent Garden.

The man turned to the woman and he sang…

 William:

 A small bird twitters over there,

He sings without a single care,

If only we could be so free,

Without the worries and the …  concerns of a nihilist.

 I would bring you flowers, but they would die.

I would love you, but, why?

 The bird responded,

 Esmeralda:

Flowers they are strange to me,

The fruits of nature that I see,

Are worms and seeds and cats and rats -

“Nuts, I love hazelnuts.”

 Ringmaster:

Bang! The bird dropped from the sky, dead

 Scene #2

Ringmaster:

Shocked, the Woman With No Name begins to have doubts…

Esmeralda:

William, I’m not sure where this is going for us…

Darling, I must tell you.

I can’t stand you – no, stronger.

You are a horse.

And now escape is what I long for.

 Why am I standing here,

listening to you sing to a bird?

I have my career as a biochemist to be getting on with…

 Scene #3

Ringmaster:

Will the newly-named Helga remain faithful to Biochemistry? Or does she prefer William, who prefers the mysterious Hans? Is the death of the bird an omen? Helga is filled with foreboding and gin…

William:

I’m sure it’s not an omen.

Helga:

But is Hans is the one for you?

 William:

The civil partnership is at noon.

 Helga:

You don’t have to say “I do”

 A woman has needs too;

Hans, you, can anyone on the Board really do?

 William:

Give me time to think as I watch the menagerie sing…..

 Helga:

…we seem to float blindly like two rafts in the fog,

I’ve been trying to reach you,

trying to reach you,

trying to tell you….

 Scene #4

 Ringmaster:

Are Helga and William really floating like rafts in the fog? Will their love land on the rocks? Is Helga’s tiny hand really frozen? As Act One continues, the temperature drops and they plan to flee…

 Helga:

I’m so cold – let’s leave Boston.

 William:

Anywhere! Around the world India, then Egypt!

 Helga:

…France or Spain, anywhere but here….

In the Serengeti, at night with mosquito net.

Our love will last forever;

Lovers of Legend – the natives won’t foorgetttttt”

 William/Helga:

Forget! forget! the natives won’t forget!

Lovers, mysterious in the mosquito net!!”

 Scene #5

 Ringmaster:

Suddenly the safari-bound lovers are parted by the arrival of the Ginger Cat, who has some news for William and some medical advice…

 Cat:

“I was once yours, and hers,

but taken away –

that is the cause of your dismay;

all isn’t lost

perhaps a pinch of smelling salts will bring her round

to seeing me for who I really am,

her one and only!

 William:

Esmeralda! Smell this! Esmeralda!’

 Helga:

You don’t even know my name,

 Both

Her name, her name, he doesn’t know her name..

that’s why she’s in the arms of so many

 - isn’t it a… shame

 Ringmaster:

Tobermory the talking cat tells the mysterious Hans how he can be reunited with his lover, William, who has been abducted and is now being held in a tower by a Chorus of Birds.

 Birds:

Tweet tweet tweet tweet tweet tweet tweet

Scene #6

 Ringmaster:

Trapped in the tower, the helpless William is forced to listen as the Birds fill in a backstory of labyrinthine complexity. William resolves to take drastic action…

 Birds:

And he just died!

William:

He is dead? Who is dead?”

 Birds:

Love. Your love has withered and it has died.

 Hans:

I am going, going to …

… search for my true love / Am claim vengeance where I may / The birds they cannot stop me now / And any challengers I will slay.” less than 5 seconds ago… search for my true love

And claim vengeance where I may

The birds they cannot stop me now

And any challengers I will slay!

 Scene #7

 Ringmaster:

William believes he has seen his own lover Hans plotting to kill him

but the flood of visions is so confusing and horrible that he cannot be sure.

Meanwhile the beautiful Helga unburdens her soul

in an aria of metaphorical lyricism and the birds are overcome with remorse for their earlier cruelty…

Scene #8

 Helga:

 When I gave my heart to William

 he said a fishsword could let go the swallows

and I will go to my man

Wherever he goes I will follow

 Cat:

 William needs to start thinking about attempting to escape.

He is no Rapunzel.

And Hans is no rescuer, he just has a cape!

Birds:

 Es tweet mir Leid…

Es tweet mir Leid…

Es tweet mir Leid…

 Scene #09

 - scene cut -

 Scene #10

 Ringmaster:

 Two or three Acts go by as Helga realises that boys and birds

are getting in the way of her life’s work

and retires to a convent in Bolivia.

After discussing matters with a Stern Nun,

Helga discovers that Corbin the Raven, King of the Birds,

is not to be trusted.

 Helga goes to the Chapel with the Stern Nun and the Mother Superior,

where they find the apparently lifeless body of the Basement Cat.

 A divine presence begins to descend,

heralded by the song of a million penguins.

 [Heavenly redemptive transformation interlude 15”]

 Scene #11

- scene cut -

 Scene #12

Ringmaster:

Meanwhile…

Back in Umberworld, the realm of the birds, Corbin the Raven

and Fraberoom the Demon are about to fight

with William singing frantically for them to stop.

 Suddenly Helga and Hans land.

 Hans:

William, we have the means to bring you back to humankind!”

 Ringmaster:

Helga holds out the potion to William (keeping some in reserve, just in case) and begs him to drink it.

William reaches for the phial, but Corbin attempts to intercept

 Corbin:

This should be mine – I too am from humankind!

 Fraberoom:

No its mine, to be humankind would be divine!

 Ringmaster:

The vile potion is thrown into the air spilling over Corbin and Fraberoom

All wait expectantly …

 … but nothing happens.

 Helga:

The potion must be imbibed to have effect

 Ringmaster:

William inspects the phial hesitantly.

 William:

How will we all return to Earth without my wings —  

A bird I must be…

 Ringmaster:

Helga nods and hands him the phial

 Helga:

A bird in the Hans, as ‘twas foretold.

if there are two birds on the roof

don’t shoot only one !

 Ringmaster:

 The demons Fraberoom and Celine charge!

 They clash in mortal combat.

 Hans swiftly imbibes the potion…

 …and sprouts beautiful rainbow wings.

Our heroes ascend to safety, leaving their foes cursing below.

 Cataclysmic apocalypse music.

The Rhine overflows.

Twitterdämmerung approaches.

The Duck of Destiny announces The End.

Scene #13 Epilogue

 Ringmaster:

 What happens next? Our story’s course is run:

The opera’s over – or has it only just begun?

 Will Hans be shot? Or maybe William hung?

 In future tweets of … Twitterdämmerung!

Corbin’s crew and Fraberoom’s gang opposite sides of the stage in umberworld.warlike music plays.

They all sing “blood, dread, I shall pronounce you dead” rpt 4 times

William is purching on a tree in the middle

The tree he purches on sings “I have been here through many age many battles rage, in the echo of time no lessons learnt”

“Alas, the vagaries of a virtual relationship don’t quench the flames of desire. Hurry, hurry before you are betrayed.”

Fraberoom unleashes a blood curdling roar “Corbin I shall slash you in half”

C “Not if my talons sink deep into your blackened heart first”

Tree “Do you not recall how this all begun? you once brothers, guardians of the sky and you sung”

Both groups circle their own leader “begin the dread, begin the blood begin the dead”

Hans enters convent &finds Helga mixing potions. Asks if she’s found something for William but she’s making something for her pain

Hans asks Helga where William is and she tells him he’s in Umberworld. He wants Helga to go with him, but she’s done with this.

Helga drinks her potion for the pain and suddenly her wings disappear. Both she and Hans get excited. This should cure William.

How to find William? Helga drinks potion again and her wings grow back. She grabs potion and Hans and flies away to Umberworld.

Back in Umberworld, Corbin and Fraberoom about to fight with W singing frantically for them to stop. Suddenly Helga and Hans land

Hans calls to William “We have the means to bring you back to humankind!”

Helga holds out the potion to William (keeping some in reserve, just in case) and begs him to drink it.

William reaches for the phial, but Corbin attempts to intercept “This should be mine- I too am from humankind!”

Fraberoom “No its mine, to be humankind would be devine” vile is throw into the air spilling over Corbin and Fraberoom

All wait expectantly, but nothing changes. Helga whispers to Hans “The potion must be imbibed to have effect”

William inspects the phial hestitantly: “How will we all return to Earth without my wings; Helga cannot carry 2 of us”

Hans turns to Helga: “A bird I must be…” Helga nods and hands him the phial: “A bird in the Hans, as twas foretold”

if there are two birds on the roof don´t shoot only one !

fraberoom, Celine and T “Charge” They run towards their enemy

Hans swiftly imbibes the potion and sprouts beautiful rainbow wings. The 3 ascend, leaving their foes cursing below.

Fraberoom, defeated, looks down. There is the discarded phial. One remaining drop of potion glistens.

Celine has seen it too: she glares at Fraberoom, reaching her gnarled fingers toward the phial. Tobermory looks on.

a crazed old woman and the talking cat battle for the soul of the hero.

F ” take it, for you deserve, the chance to reserve..a new life you shall begin, my love for your vile features shall never din

Celine blows a kiss to Fraberoom.grabbing the phial with her black nails the potion hits her tongue.C “it burns” hissing sound.

smoke surrounds Celine, burning sound

T “what stench has become of you, Fraberoom has betrayed your blackened heart, to the firey pits of hell you depart”

With an orange puff of smoke she disappears

T “I must to descend to where i belong, farewell Fraberoom my evil friend” grabbing a sheet he parachutes back to earth”

a 30 piece marching band parachutes alongside him playing a dramatic melody for his gusty descent back to solid ground

Tobermory decides he has to relocate his mother, now he is human again “I have now seen the importance of family love”

He has no idea where she, Hans and William have flown to, but he MUST find her! He casts around for inspiration

Tobermory decides to begin his search in the nunnery. He charters a flight to Bolivia – - Santa Ave convent next!

REWIND A BIT… Meanwhile, Hans wanders into tavern The Pear Tree, parched. Inside… Bird Chorus (drinking song, with tankards):

When threescore 10 times 2 is the sum of the equation, It’s all about the adrenaline rush of instant gratification!

Art or no, bizarrely we agree of this concoction, Its taste is such that once acquired it grows into addiction!

(Hans changes his mind & wanders out again, in search of tavern with NO BIRDS notice on door.)

(Unseen by departing Hans, Will appears, as malevolent burst of song is heard from inside tavern)

Chorus: What are they going to do about poor William?/ Should they just take the easy way out and kill’im?

(In reflective pool nearby Will gazes down & addresses his mirror image, disgusted with world, Hans included): Circling vultures!

A pox on their flock! May Bird Flu gatecrash their nasty soiree! Oh woe is me! Trapped as I am in this fractured plot of

…misunderstandings, this nervous breakdown in communications where forced nonlinear brevity robs my very essence…

…of sense & levity, & all seems raucously lost in translation! Is a curse once uttered never to be revoked?

Fie! Left to my own devices here, I may indulge in some verbosity.

(Tavern door opens & Ghost of Alfred Hitchcock responds, with tankard): A Fish Tale with a whale’s avoirdupois.

…That is my word for the day. (Ghost of Alfred Hitchcock goes back inside tavern)

Will, startled: Is that a clockful of cuckoos? (Sings, to tune of Sing a Song of Sixpence):

1. Was I not a fool to sign away my life/ In matrimony’s pact to that twit’ring fishwife?!

What future may await me is perilously dim! When spells must be reversed it seems I need the Brothers Grimm.

2. I’d rather live a fairy tale than a nightmare,/ I see it now, my rescue as Royalty’s heir/

Bestows the kiss of life (with elegance & grace!) Permitting me to rightfully rejoin the human race.

3. A noble calling hath the canary in the mine, But seekers of the job form a very short line!

If they find their blackbirds down to 23, Will they fill their horrid pie by putting in me?

Ghost of Alfred Hitchcock pops head out): On that note of pessimism I’d like to make a point about the villains of this piece…

… Such monstrous egomaniacs would kill for 15 minutes of fame! Maim for 10. Hurt some poor wretch really badly for 5…

… So desperate for attention are they in fact, they’d gleefully make a swap of 1 celebrity moment for a Chinese Burn.

(Ghost slams tavern door, Will jumps into tree. Ghost reappears): And the moral of the story is simple. Beware, all who venture

..into the shadows of Umberworld! For here the risk of Identity Theft is real. And surreal!…

… Witness this gentleman here with the feathers. (Ghost disappears into tavern)

Hmm. Racing plot probably now indicates otherwise but… Does Helga turn out to be a Princess, & Will her long-lost regal brother?

Children of… the Evil Lord Corbin & Lady Fraberoom (divorced, embittered, sworn enemies now but long ago in love & conjugal bliss…

Or perhaps together Evil Lord Cor & Lady Frab were once a half-bird half-cat monster, The Siamese Falcon…

… that reproduced asexually by splitting into the 2 villains that we know & fear today.

& then produced 1 royal heir each, Helga & Will. A chaste peck on the cheek from Helga has the power to restore Will, and

Will & Hans (Hans… Solonomore…) can again be a bickering couple? All things possible in parallel world of Starling Wars…

Tobermory arrives at nunnery but it is deserted. Where has everyone gone? Even the birds in the trees are silent

Tobermory finds a half-burnt map. He makes out the words ‘Nazca lines’ and the shape of a hummingbird. “To Peru”

Somewhere in Peru, Tobermory on an alpaca, map in hand, seeking directions to Nazca and lines. Herdsman appears ….

Herdsman regards Tobermory with amusement: “Nazca, señor? You’ll need more than an Alpaca if you want to get there”

“Kind sir, pray tell how I should arrive there. I seek my kin with a map saying ‘Nazca lines’. I know not of this”

Herdsman “Only from above do the Nazca lines show their wonder. Do you fly, young traveller?”

Tob’mory sighs: “Flight is the one thing I cannot do, señor. I must find the hummingbird symbol. Would you guide me?”

Are you a blogger or an aspiring journalist who is interested in opera, music, ballet or dance? If so, then we’d like to hear from you. The Royal Opera House is looking for an enthusiastic team of writers and bloggers to contribute to the Royal Opera House blog.

We would like people to  help us round-up media coverage and reviews and report on key events at the Royal Opera House as well as in the wider world of opera and ballet. Work will be commissioned on a monthly basis and may involve occasional visits to the Royal Opera House; from time-to-time, this may mean attending events or performances, and work will be engaged on a freelance basis, at a standard fee. We’re particularly interested in hearing from you if you are happy to take photographs and aren’t afraid to turn on a video camera.

If you are interested in contributing and have an existing blog or online portfolio that you can share, please email your details to website@roh.org.uk, using “ROH Blog” as the subject line. We would like to commission the first round of content w/c 7 September, so if you would like to be considered for this please ensure we have your details before 3 September. We will try to reply to all interested parties, but please understand that this may not be possible.

Here’s the story of the Twitter Opera so far:

Full summaries of the extraordinary Tweets that have taken us up to Act 7 of the Twitter-written opera. So far, there are nuns, demons, a bird man, misery, vengeance and love.

Act One: Scene One, Scene Two, Scene Three

Act Two

Act Three

Acts Four and Five

Acts Six and Seven

Act Six

Tobermory appears and confronts Helga; she is rather unhappy and declares that he must not underestimate her again. He is followed by an axe-wielding Mother Superior, who has come to protect Helga. She lunges at Tobermory but Helga intervenes – the cat is her son! He was transformed to feline form by imbibing a potion.

Mother Superior gasps: “No, I cannot believe that lie! Tobermory must die!” She swings the axe again; Helga goes to protect her son, and in doing so loses her little finger. The drop of maternal blood falls upon the cat and he transforms into a human form.

Helga is beside herself as she watches her son distort: “I need to end my awful plight … I have been foolish in this life to care more for science than those I love.” Mother Superior takes pity upon Helga and – swinging her axe – says, “I shall commit thee to the dark”. BUT! William the birdman swoops to earth and gathers Helga into this wings.

A policewoman appears, in pursuit of Mother Superior. The nun outsmarts her and goes on the run, singing, “You shall not take me down, I run from this godly town.”

William’s grasp weakens and he drops Helga to the ground. She is dead. Tobermory (now a human) swears to avenge his mother.

Act Seven, Scene One

Helga is not-yet dead. She entreats the body of the Basement Cat to come to her assistance; her bag explodes and she is engulfed in a welter of flame, only to emerge with a pair of beautiful wings upon her back.

Holding Mother Superior’s axe aloft, she flies after William, singing that she has realised her mistake: “A bird in the HANS is worth two in the bush, finally I understand.”

Act Seven, Scene Two

Tobermory is at a dark cave; he has gone in search of a dragon who might assist him. But instead he finds the demons Fraberoom and Celine, whom he begs to come to his aid in his battle against William.

Act Seven, Scene Three – an idyllic distraction

Hans is asleep in the forest. He is hungry and dreams of a really good seafood restaurant, managed by the ghost of Alfred Hitchcock.

Act Seven, Scene Four

Corbin is holding court, sitting in a tree and surveying his minions. He spies the Mother Superior sitting below, hiding behind a rock, and outlining her dastardly plan: “I will not be caught / I need that scientist Helga in short”.

Corbin lands upon Mother Superior’s rock and says that William has gone to Umberworld: Kingdom of the Birds, and that Helga was seen in pursuit. He offers to fly Mother Superior to Umberworld, providing she becomes one of his flock.

Act Seven, Scene Five

In Umberworld, William is tweeting to himself, demanding to be made a man. The birds sit around and listen to his plight.

Act Seven, Scene Six

Helga has abandoned her pursuit of William and returned to the convent. She hears a flood of birdsong and regrets her earlier quest for vengeance.

Act 4, Scene 1

Helga realises that boys and birds are getting in the way of her life’s work and retires to a convent, to benefit from the superior facilities.

Act 4, Scene 2

Helga settles into the convent (which happens to be in Bolivia); after discussing matters with a Stern Nun, she discovers that Corbin, King of the Birds, is not to be trusted and has meddled in the love affairs of others.

Act 4, Scene 3

Helga goes to the Chapel with Stern Nun and the Mother Superior; they find the body of the Basement Cat and Helga is told that he is powerful and can assist her. A divine presence begins to descend, heralded by the song of a million penguins. Meanwhile. Helga plans to introduce Basement Cat to William, in the hope that he may be restored as a man. She is deep in thought and sings an aria that reflects her deep longing and unrequited love.

On the horizon, we catch a glimpse of William, arriving at the Balm of Bray.

Act Four, Scene Four

Helga has a revelatory moment; if she can find a bush with two birds in it, all will be well. She sets off on a pilgrimage, wearing her famous purple raincoat, with the body of Basement Cat in her bag and her chemistry set beneath her arm.

Act Five, Scene One

Hans and William are at the Balm of Bray; Hans is feeding birdseed to William and wondering how he can restore his humanity.

Act Five, Scene Two

The spirit of Basement Cat has remained in the Chapel. The divine descending presence is revealed to be Ceiling Cat who delivers a pious aria, singing that “My passion for good cannot let you go.”

Act Five, Scene Three

We see Helga on her pilgrimage, listening to the sad songs of Nutella, the opera singer/femme fatale, on her iPod and wallowing in her unrequited love. Perhaps through the power of the Basement Cat, she has realised that she must go to the Balm of Bray – perhaps she will find a bird-filled bush there?

She also recalls a moment at the convent, when she noticed a mysterious woman who appears to have a secret. Who was she? What is she hiding?

Act Five, Scene Four

Helga arrives at the Balm of Bray, where there is (conveniently) a porter called Wilfred at the gate; he tells her that the bird-man and his lover are in the square, but there is much unhappiness due to an accident with the sandwiches.

to be continued…

Posted in 1 ]]> http://royaloperahouse.wordpress.com/2009/08/18/acts-4-and-5-in-summary/feed/ 0 royaloperahouse http://royaloperahouse.wordpress.com/2009/08/18/tuesdays-line-by-line-update/ http://royaloperahouse.wordpress.com/2009/08/18/tuesdays-line-by-line-update/#comments Tue, 18 Aug 2009 09:52:07 +0000 royaloperahouse http://royaloperahouse.wordpress.com/?p=166 ]]>

Good Morning Opera Tweeters

Here are the tweets as they have unfolded. Summary to follow in a moment.

We’ve have failed in our attempt to ensnare Bill/who is it now we shall maim and kill/we do not know but it shall be a thrill

The cats burts into a duet as William escapes, the melody mimicking William`s flight as they lament the loss of their prey

‘Helga!’ the stern nun summons her to the courtyard. ‘I hear you’re here to get away from love.’ Day dreams, ‘I loved once too..’

I loved him more than he me, he went away far away, away across the seas, so I came to this nunnery..’

Helga: ‘why didn’t you go after him?’ Stern Nun: ‘it was a fight against the birds – I swam as far as I could, but..’

‘..but I was not strong enough. I came here and mourned my loss. You mustn’t waste your life like I haaave..’

Helga: ‘So Corbin the King of the Birds is not to be trusted?’ Stern Nun: ‘I will leave that for you to decide’..

Stern Nun leaves Helga in the courtyard, as she contemplates and hums a woeful song

Helga “I shall await the arrival of a lederhosen lover which may prove difficult in this Bolivian nunnery (sigh)”

Sister Mary Magpie explains that Helga can continue her biochemical work from the nunnery only if she agrees to…

..to work alongside their very special guest …

Good morrow good Helga, good Helga good morrow!

To our nunnery-laboratory you are welcome. I am Mother Superior and Chief Technician, and my name is…

Stern Nun and Sister Mary Magpie accompany Helga to the chapel where (shock) Basement Cat lies unconscious but alive!

“He can hear you; speak to him Helga. Although he cannot wake, his mind is powerful – he can help you”

A Million Penguins look upwards to the heavens (and fall over) as a divine presence descends – sings. “I have dimensions, three.”

The divine presence continues “I am the very model of a fully rounded character.” Penguins chorus “she is so very rounded.”

at this spectacle Stern Nun, Sister Mary swoon, however Helga attempts to join the chorusing penguins

however her singing is scratchy and out of tune, and also strangely off pitch

at this spectacle Stern Nun & Sister Mary swoon, however Helga attempts to join the chorusing penguins, not knowing the words…

Unfortunately, her voice is offensively scratchy and off key, and peculiarly high pitched

Basement cat, in an unconcious trance mews: “it appears that the combination of the penguins’ and Helga’s vocal emissions have

caused a time loop, a perpetual cycle of swooning, singing and screetching that can only be broken by…”

Suddenly a sweet scent in the air.

…who fancies Helga and thus Corbin for some reason feels the need to eliminate William and dramatically she does…

Helga leans in to BC “I hear him, Sister. He seems to be talking about penguins. What can this mean, Sister?”

Our habit is black and white, my daughter.”

Helga cannot calm her mind, nor escape from thinking of William . Her mind is in torment. She must be rid of him for good.

A plan begins – William the bird; Basement Cat – her only part would be to ensure the two met and let nature take its own course

Helga, suddenly seeing the nuns properly “This must mean, between the basement and the ceiling there are nun but us.”

Helga: And now to find another cell / the one where mother superior doth dwell

Helga: Ah, here she is. (knocks on door). “Enter!” sounds from within…

Helga: Mother Superior – I must find my laboratory!

Mother Superior: Down the corridor, third on the right dearie!

Helga: No, Mother, my lab-o-ratory…

Mother Superior: We have a very nice Oratory, just down the corridor, fourth on the right…

Helga: No, Mother, somewhere I can go to do my experiments…

Mother S: I think you’re confusing us with a University, dearie. What’s with all this talking? Let’s have an aria!

In the nunnery, Helga (or whatever her name is) has access to a biochemistry lab and wants to brew a potion to lure her love..mf

A desperate yearning, unrequited. I long to be closer to my love, See how strong my passion burns, If only it could be returned

I need a token from my lover, something he wears or treasures well. I will use it for the brew, weave with it a magic spell

If I brew a special potion, who knows what I set in motion? My feelings for him are intense, I’m ready to take the consequence!

Helga hoped to find peace in the nunnery, but to no avail.

Daybreak, time to wake. Splash water on my face, Wash away the shameful thoughts that chase me thru the night: unclean, obscene

Pleasures of the flesh: bodies enmesh, Nudes recline, limbs entwine, how I long to make him mine.

My passion warms me in the cold. If sister Agnes knew, how she would scold. Sometimes my thoughts are scary, best say Hail Mary

Can’t stop thinking of his smile, his face, even when I’m saying Grace, it makes my senses reel. How can I help the way I feel?

In the nunnery, Helga (or whatever her name is) has access to a biochemistry lab and wants to brew a potion to lure her love..

A desperate yearning, unrequited. I long to be closer to my love, See how strong my passion burns, If only it could be returned

I need a token from my lover, something he wears or treasures well. I will use it for the brew, weave with it a magic spell

If I brew a special potion, who knows what I set in motion? My feelings for him are intense, I’m ready to take the consequence!

Helga can find no peace in the nunnery, she thinks only of her unrequited love

William departed for the “Balm of Bray”, for he heard there he would find Jacki and the Unicorn Lord.

Daybreak, time to wake. Splash water on my face, Wash away the shameful thoughts that chase me thru the night: unclean, obscene

Pleasures of the flesh: bodies enmesh, Nudes recline, limbs entwine, how I long to make him mine.

Can’t stop thinking of his smile, his face, even when I’m saying Grace, it makes my senses reel. How can I help the way I feel?

William departed for the “Balm of Bray”, for he heard there he would find Jacki and the Unicorn Lord.

If you listen to whispers, you will not hear screams.

Leadership: cedeing control seeding control growing performance harvesting excellence.

To Tweet / two Tweet / too Tweeeet!

the talking sword wants to be a chef’s knife.

Helga realised she was becoming delerious. She focused her mind: “My feelings shouldn’t matter; reunite Hans & Will!”

With her mind clear, Helga returned to the inner chapel to commune with Basement Cat. She took her notebook with her.

I want to let it all out,but I dont know what it is.If you love me,help me.

Basement Cat looked serene (with tubes and monitors attached). Helga closed her eyes and concentrated.

Helga, inspired by a particularly vibrant sunrise, returns to her tattered diary, which contains her aunt’s own convent story.

Basement Cat’s words resonated in Helga’s mind: “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”. It was all so clear now

All Helga had to do was find the bush with the two birds, then and only then would she succeed

Helga set off on her adventure, after pulling on her signature purple raincooat and polka dot boots.

O that wings of gold would let silver stories unfold Helga Helga says Eurydice lead me to the cage of stories untold

With Basement Cat, her trusty chemistry set and her aunt’s diary in her bag, Helga boarded a train to Umberworld.

Meanwhile, at the gates of the ‘Balm of Bray’, Hans wonders how to make William Human again. He feeds him birdseed.

Our love william is as sweet as chocolate

In the chapel of the nunnery: Helga has left. B-Cat just lies there. C-Cat appears:

C-Cat: Up to your evil tricks again, I see. This good house is not a place for you to be.

B-Cat (by thought; laughing): I am dead, fun still to be had, as I earlier said. You’ve seen nothing yet.

C-Cat: You worry me, you worry me so. But my passion for good cannot let you go. — B-Cat: I know. I SO knoooooooooooooooow!

*Enter Nutella, a 6′2″ blonde who is part Viking, part Amazon, & all Raymond Chandler bishop-window-kicker* She…

opens her ruby lips & sings: How is it that my men are birds/ for this sort of thing a dame has no words FML

With FML meaning ‘Fillet Mia Longo’, meaning ‘My Man Has Mutated Into A Bird, Something Is Fishy Here & I Am Longing’

“Fille-e-e-e-et mia longo/My man has left me now/ Why did he do me wrongo/ He’s a bird, the bloody cow.

Fille-e-e-et mia longo/ My beloved flew away/I crave his wings so strongo/But people say he’s also gay.

Fille-e-et, fillet mia longo/ I ho-o-o-pe he hears my tragic songo/Fille-e-e-t, fillet mia longo-/I’m getting a cat.

Fille-e-et, fillet mia longo/Oh no-o-o- & I just bought a thongo!/Fille-e-e-t, fillet mia longo-/The traitorous rat.

‘Fillet Mia Longo’(Aria): A lady’s not a girl/Without her man/He flies off like a bird?!/(And he hates bran!)

Fille-e-e-e-et mia longo/ I can’t mate with a tern/ I’m moving to the Congo,/And might become a fern.

Fille-e-e-t, fillet mia longo/(And now, enter the bongos)[sung]/ Fille-e-e-e-t, fillet/mia longo-/Imagi-ine that.

Fille-e-et, fillet mia longo/My lo-o-o-o-ve, hit,my,heart,like,Pong-o/Fille-e-t,fillet mia longo-/I hope u go splat!!

Helga turns off her iPod and fumbles in her bag. She holds the comatose B-Cat aloft: “Next stop the Balm of Bray…”

Helga’s cell door opens, enter Mother Superior, a fully rounded character of ample proportions, intelligent, witty, mezzosoprano

Mother Superior: “Welcome! How delightful to have such an accomplished scientist amongst us at last! Can you make decent tea?”

“who is that girl sitting near the birdbath? her worn out habit makes me laugh… what is her secret?”

Upon arrival, Helga asks a porter, “Have you heard of the man that is bird and his lover who is like no other?”

She takes a deep breath and falls asleep.

Wilfred (the porter) to Helga: “You’ll find them in the main square, but sadness is all you’ll find there”

Helga asks Wilfred: “Why, has there been a tragic accident with sandwiches?!?”

Suddenly Tobermory enters in a cloud of smoke with an evil meow, saying “Oh how wondrous is the art of fowl lobotomy…”

You are the one I have been looking for,searching for years almost gave up my hope,but now I know.you’ll nver let me heart sore

Helga: “Tobermory…we meet again at last. You underestimated me before and so shall you again.”

Enter Mother Superior, with axe: “Evil feline, o devil so furry/I’ll end your life, thou fiend Tobermory” She swings axe at cat

And now Mother Superior is paralyzed! What’s happened?!

Helga (to mother s): “wait! Stop, you can’t! Tobermory he’s…my son!” She falls to knees. Mother S is flab’gasted!

Helga: “Tobermory was not always feline, accidentally on a potion he did dine, and now lives he has nine”

Mother Superior gasps “No I cannot believe this lie. Tobermory must now die!” She grins evilly and swings the axe again!!!

Helga screams “NO!” She dives in front of her beloved Tobermory, and looses a pinky finger to the axe.

a 30 piece orchestra marches in as helga starts singing in the pain & anguish

Then suddenly, Tobermory rears up on his hind legs. “I was not always feline, and I am still not feline.” He begins to change.

As Tobermory changes chorus of birds scattered through audience sing ‘Once was fiend/once was foe/transmogrify/the mog we know!’

Helga beings to climb “I need to end my awful plight, i have lost the will and fight, all i crave for is a single silent night”

T “Mummy mummy why leave me now, you are not ready to take your final bow”

Mother S “I have had with this lark” grabbing the axe again “I shall commit thy to the dark”

still climbing H “I shall climb down for your single wish” Mother S throwing the axe at H “Ha plummet to your final dish”

the axe misses, H slips “my grip is slipping, I have been foolish in this life to care more for science than those that love”

She falls at this moment the birdman swoops in catching H “I shall save you for one last time, is that the clock i hear chime”

Mother S “Why do my plans all fail” in walks a police lady “your under arrest, off to jail”

“you shalt not take me down, i will run from this godly town” runs off stage.

birdman descends with H “my wings weaken I must drop you now” H “if you do it will be my final bow”

bridman “too late my grip has gone” bang she hits the floor “sorry fair lady but your has story has shone”

T runs over to H crying he sings “your life has been cut short, i shall avenge your death with one final epic eternal retort”

T “I must go and seek, to kill the weak, the one beast of flight and untame, the dragon from the north cave of Ellishame”

But wait, Helga moves! She extends a frail hand towards her bag “Basement Cat, hear me now”

The bag bursts into blue flame, a beam of light engulfs Helga and wings appear from her back. She flies after William

the cat has gone, brandishing the the axe Helga drags herself across the stage in pursuit singing “I will not, i will not die”

Axe aloft, Helga takes flight: “A bird in the HANS is worth two in the bush – finally I understand”.

T approaches the cave “what lurks in this dark evil chasm” a burst of flames erupt from the cave “that made my brave core spasm”

Tobermory: “Man or feline, there is nothing so fine as love can define – good luck mother”

T approaches the cave “what lurks in this dark evil chasm” a burst of flames erupt from the cave “that made my brave core spasm”

t shouts “hark fine beast I need your aid, to cause havok and chaos on a heavenly parade” More fire comes out of cave

T: “It must be some ungodly demon, who focuses on the wayward freeman…

demon speaks in a loud low tone “you awake me from this pillar of death and tomb, addrress me by name and curse… Fraberoom”

In the orchestra, some kind of frightening interlude takes place using the traditional “Dies Irae” theme.

Orchestral interlude ends with a very high note (representing a scream) being sung by an unseen female character…

T “you are no curse, you are a blessing to anoint the wounds of my revenge,Similar pain you feel so come on and yourself forshow”

(this being said underneath the tones of the scream, which is still going)

Fraberoom roars “You know of my wretched past”, lights dim, flicker red and orange to represent fire.

Enter Celine, the evil-genius female feline (culprit of the scream): “Noooooooooo! Forswear this other trickster here and now!”

T “Your bashment is caused by Corbon commander of crows the battle was long bloody to thro it ended by wings ripped and shred”

f “I AM FORSAKEN AND BROKEN”

Celine: “For reasons beneficial to all inhabitants of this world!”

C: “Frarebroom, I will be forced to use my genius to destroy the hold you have on this poor sot whom you would employ!”

T “I ignore your wicked spells, you ancient witch of spiteful forgotten era, i need this warrior to battle those i want dead”

Roaring, Fraberoom emerges out of the cave. a scrarred old dragon his scales that used to be gold and copper are now faded to tin

T jumps on Fs back,bass drums pound in time with his wings,T and f sing “bringer of war and death i shall have my revenge”

C grabs fs tail and cackles “I shall stop this absurdity even if i have to lay down my own life” leave stage (t+f sing on)

Corbin roosts in a tree with his minions and the sun setting behind him “what beauty it is to be alive”

Meanwhile, Hans asleep in forest, Will has flown the coop & …

Ghost of Alfred Hitchcock in forest (Bryn Terfel!):…

Oh say did that 4-leg/ged critter survive? (Star Spangled Banner tune ‘yet wave’ line)

…By the skin of its teeth in the 9th of its lives! (Stratosphere on ‘teeth’

Ghost of Alfred Hitchcock (tune O Sole Mio): …

…Oh Holy Mackerel!! What’s happened here? The Fishsword’s length now/ exceeds a spear’s!

Ghost (cont.): I think a different kettle/ of fish entirely may soon appear!

(This must be the Fat Lady and if she is about to sing, is the end is nigh?? Looks peckish and Hans is snack she fancies!)

The Fat Lady sings to Hans (The Flower Duet tune or repeating bits of it, the experts’ll have to work it out):

Sole Meuniere, paella, Cajun gumbo, shrimp & mussels, lobster, cockles, breaded haddock, pickled herrings & a stew…

Fried octopus, fish casserole, Oysters Rockefeller, cod & chips, a kipper, scallops, calamari, not a single one will do!

They can keep them! I won’t eat them! Such a tender morsel of a man I can’t resist a little nibble out of you!

(As 1st) I’ve had enough/ of fishy stuff! If I see another tuna sandwich I will beat a hasty path to Timbuktu!

(Rpt tune)I’ve had my fill! Fish makes me ill! Never in a month of Sunday dinners will I go back to the seafood counter’s queue!

I must have you! Let me taste you! Doesn’t really matter if you’re cooked or raw I’d love to take a bite out of you!

(As 1st) Don’t fight with me! Won’t hurt a bit!…

… Just a sample, just a little speck is all I want, I want, I want to take a bite out of you!

(Rpt tune) You scrumptious thing! Mouthwatering!…

…Back to sleep now, just relax, I promise I’ll be quick, don’t worry, I won’t bite off more than I can chew!

I am drooling! Tummy’s growling! Yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy you!

Hans grabs shard of ruined Fishsword & lunges, the Fat Lady shimmies aside & laughs carelessly, Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha etc.

Ghost: He’ll put someone’s eye out with that thing if he’s not careful! His own!

Amahl: I have here in the pocket of my white lab coat the last few drops of Helga’s potion in a vial….

(Cont.) Amahl: The bomb’s blast will have altered its properties. I cannot say what effect it may now have…

… Should I hurl it and find out?

Ghost: Now is your moment, my countertenor friend! (Ghost retreats)

(Cont.) Amahl removes cap of vial and throws its contents at the Fat Lady who screams operatically (Cue smoke machine!)…

…She freezes like a statue, & has to stay like that as Amahl (Greg Pritchard!) steps forward & sings to Hans (Barcarolle tune)…

Amahl sings: I for one will cross in future several lanes of traffic/ If I spot a seafood restaurant so that I’ll avoid it

Amahl (cont.) For a hero you’re a pretty ineffective fencer. May I suggest a safer job – a bank? Or selling menswear?

At least you weren’t the feast of this creature in sequins, but now you’ve lost your Tweetie.

Amahl (cont) She got her PhD in Idiocy! You must agree, you must agree. Ah! Ah! Ah! (Hans exits in panic in search of lost Will)

Amahl (alone with frozen Fat Lady) sings a bit more of Barcarolle tune

Amahl: Scientific research is no longer my cup of tea. A waiter in a posh hotel – now there’s the job for me! (Hums)

(The Fat Lady suddenly ‘thaws’ and comes back to life, blinking and looking surprised.)

The Fat Lady: Oh, is this Covent Garden? I must have slept through my stop!

The Fat Lady to Amahl: You’re a cutie! Don’t look so nervous, I won’t eat you! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha! …

…Bye bye! Bye bye! (With flick of sequined tail the Fat Lady shimmies offstage)

‘we shall reject apathy to impress the one armed collie and learn a new word everyday. so here concludes our fair tale of twit”

Meanwhile Mother S is hiding behind rock “I will not be caught, for angered with frought, I need that scientist Helga in short

Corbin flies down to rock circled by his flock “I hear you seek the one with the new beak, the birdwoman has flown to umberworld

MS “umberworld world what a ridiculous notion have you been drinking Helga’s potion”

C “the land of the birds it is truely named, you should feel ashamed”

C continues “Do you want help or not godly creature, I can become you new gdly teacher” flock squawk in unison “join us” rpt

MS “a message from god this must be, I shall join you, fly me, fly me fly me to umberworld”

C “I agree on one condition, that you join my flock with no fruitions,we shall do in one mighty purge with a swoop and surge”

Like A Shooting Star, The Illumined Mind, It Gives The Moon Its’ Shine

William lands in a clearing and, cursing nature, demands to be made man again. He begins tearing at his feathers.

As the sun begins to set, William sings himself to sleep. Birds settle on trees around him & listen solemnly.

And while mad men cry of lost feasts and wring their briny hands, there is Helga in her cloister. Is it God she hears, or birds?

Helga: “I am so uneasy, my stomach is queasy, there is something about convent life I don’t like ….”

Helga cont: “Those habits and wimples, they give a girl pimples! There’s something about convent life I don”t like.”

Helga: “why did I not think this out? I wanted quiet no doubt. But what made me think I cld do lab work in here? It’s SO so drear

Helga:”I must leave, I must go. I miss William so. And the birds, their sweet tweets, their twitters & peeps to them I must go”

But when Helga returns from the convent, she finds Hans hanging around William. Also a lovely actress in stilettos

The darkness of desires the true form of love where are we to go in this dark world the birds and swords

The darkness of desires the true form of love where are we to go in this dark world the birds and swords

the infinities of desires the true wisdom at will the red sun and moon that shine together on the blue sky

To be precise, we are at the very start of Act 4, which opens with Helga deciding to leave all these birds / boys / birdboys alone, so that she can be serious in a convent.

Just beforehand, William has turned into a bird, the Fish Sword has started to speak and we have had a brief glimpse at the kingdom of the birds (Umberworld, for some unfathomable reason). There is a hint of a new character (Corbin the Raven, who commands a flight of birds).

The big questions for Act 4 are: What on earth is going to happen to Helga? Will the convent allow her to get on with some serious biochemistry or will it be full of conversational crows? Will William turn back into a human or will he suddenly discover that he’s King of the Birds and the ruler of all he surveys in Umberworld? Will someone introduce a really decent, three-dimensional female character (please?)? The choice is yours…

Act 3, Scene 1

Hans tries and fails to rescue William, and finds himself relegated to Umberworld: Kingdom of the Birds, where everything is very iron and magnesium rich as well as being a funny shade of browny-yellow.

Helga, slaving away in her laboratory, finds herself suddenly overwhelmed by the fumes of the potion and collapses to the floor. We see her thoughts writ large, and witness her despair.

Meanwhile – in Aerie – Corbin the raven galvanises a flight of birds to go to Sweet William’s aid.

Act 3, Scene 2

William looks desolate from the tower window. “Now I am just a speck of light / Only a spark in time / Now it’s a mere piece of dust / This empty life of mine”.

The Basement Cat is heard from beyond the grave, inspiring William to carry on. Suddenly William is transformed into a bird.

Act 3, Scene 3

The sword regains it power and speak to Hans: “You are me / And I am you”. Hans outstretches his arms and William flies towards him – into his arms.

Act 4, Scene 1

Helga realises that boys and birds are getting in the way of her life’s work and retires to a convent, to benefit from the superior facilities.

Nutella!, Nutella! … bring me my Nutella!

Hans declares that the sword is not as powerful as his devotion to William – he breaks down the door.

Hans runs up the spiral staircase to resue his love, carrying the fishsword which is still lifeless

This vile liquid destroys the language we form together. To understand the birds one must give up love and coherence and grammar.

Hans, fueled with supernatural fervour, ascends bravely. He reaches the final door, but it is made of steel…

Birds may fly so high,I wish the sky Will cry&wipe my tears For she’s no more here by my side,I long to break her last goodbye

the woman with no name sits in the lab and begins to make a potion. As the chemicals combine they knock her to the ground.

We now see the inner thoughts of the woman with no name. As she lies unconscious on the floor.

Yo! roars Hans. 1000 tweets soar. Fishsword reverberates – spills out white fire. Door shatters and reality shifts. Umberworld!

Birds may fly so high,I wish the sky Will cry&wipe my tears For she’s no more here by my side,I long to break her last goodbye

Hans in Umberworld – where birds are the dominant species and man is ornamental… He staggers…

Hearing William’s lament within his steel prison, Hans sinks to his knees. But wait…a voice in the darkness (Helga?)

a breeze whips then whirls, carrying both birds & squirrels, whispering to Will “I have the answer & it is blowing in the wind”

as the woman w/no name sits in her laboratory reeling in shame for her potion, powerless does remain ~ here comes the wind again.

The wind to Will: “be not a nit-twit, but twitter with wit for then thy words will ride on the wind & lift the wings of tweeters.

tweeters join the swirl, sending the wind to the girl; w/gentle wings they flutter by, wiping the tears and ending the cry; sigh.

A cry! And then another! Stillness.

Silence is broken. You can clearly hear a tweet. Obviously this is not a bird!

And all of a sudden those wishful thoughts gained form,and turned into a huge and solid cloud.The power of many tweeting the same

Woman-with-no-name (or: Helga; or…) works on her potion. And starts thinking about … herself:

A drop, a drop, a pinch of some this / Then some more stirring / And a spoon full of mist

A moment of stillness before the dawn, reflect and contemplate, then celebrate and dance the dawning of another day.

The potion will be / William’s salvation / … / And tears for me.

Is my heart not there? / In my chest alone? / Is my life not worth it? / The touch of his care? /

Am I to be / … / For ever just me?

Shall I give voice to the aves above? / Or speak to me? About my own true love? /

Oh, Hans forgive! / Oh, Hans, please see! / I can either save William / … / Or I can save me.

ALS, your time has come and gone. The cure is your undoing. Now we live & you die!

Ginger cat circles the tower looking for a way to help William escape. Suddenly, he is distracted as a rabbit runs past him.

Chorus: “kill the wabbit, kill the wabbit”

The rabbit: “My life is worth more than a passing fancy, I do not wish to be death’s fiancee.” The cat laughs.

I wish there was a potionTHAT shakes Helgas emotionAND get her by this towerAND forget all the wabbit did to her morals Downunder

I SEEM to BE the prisoner BUT Helgas secret quest last year, LEFT us all in unsolved trouble, Wabbit skin hides true evil…

YEEEAAAAAAARGH EEEEeeeeeeee! (Sung to the tune of Ring of Nibelung by Wagner)

The cats – ceiling & basement – speak to William in his dreams:C-Cat: Don’t you see? / You had a choice!

B-Cat: Don’t you see? / You had a voice! – Both: Killing that bird has been your demise!

Both (cont.) Your life is over / over and gone. The birds have tweeted. It’s all in their song!

Stop your heart’s beating / Stop your fight / There is no more meaning / Your end is in sight.

C-Cat: Look how he lies in that nest of despair… / Look how he still wishes… — B-Cat: Not to lie there.

Both (fading away as William awakes): And yet…

The sweet girl wept silently, as the sheer power of the dumpsterfire engulfed not just he possessions, but her spirit as well

Wliiam: Helga, the failed Fish Sword can only be saved by the poison of the fish blow. The sack of poison from your Fugu.

William: Helga, the failed Fish Sword can only be saved by the poison of the fish blow. The sack of poison from your Fugu.

The cats appear to William. “Hans will arrive soon. You must seek out the Two Jacks. They will lead you to the ‘Balm of Bray’”

William: Helga, the failed Fish Sword can only be replaced by the poison of the Fish Blow. The sack of poison from your Fugu.

In the nearby Aerie, Corbin the raven addresses the gathered corvidae: “The flock protecting Sweet William has been killed, …”

“.. and we must find a way to go and protect him from the haunts in the tower, and not be killed ourselves, as that would ..”

“.. do no good. Now, Rook Chorniy, please advise us.”

In the darkness the birds flew away. Several bats flew in. The bats flew in. The cat spied the bats, but the bats flew high.

“No one knows the agony”

“What’s in a name? That which we call a bird by any other name would sound as tweet.”

Ah, tweet sorrow. Ah tweet life of mine.”

Cat: The fishsword will not speak to bird / until the cry of seagull’s heard

Cat: To stormy cove you must repair / and seek the stormy petrel’s lair

Hans: Oh Lord! These steep and slickery stones must be a way to Williams. I want to be a bird. Flying singing to the top.

“But, no”, she decides, “one deviation does not a disaster make. My potion shall put this aright.”

Far away the sound of bells.

We must prepare with the raven’s dance of doom. (cue pantomime!)

This vile potion and strange dance marry must to make these mortal chains return to dust

No, I don’t think I will kiss you – that’s what’s wrong with you. You should be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how.

For the Cat hath morlocked thy name, and revenge must follow

audienceman gets up jumps on stage “blow this off fair maiden for a frappacinco, and leave these two, to find loves small window”

and thy sword has grown to the size of a Halibut

the Cat “thows kingdom has become a dumpster fire, for all curses have come to fruition”

and Helgas desire has grown to the size of a Halibut, to be quenched only by thee found by computer love

Helga sings “I cannot cheat my heart, for the one i desire, back to your seat serander”

Cat walks over to serander “I can make fulfill loves long desire, to kill both hans william you shall meet this desire”

Sometimes you just have to burn all your bridges and just swim across the river.

Cat walks over to serander “I can make and fulfill loves long desire, to kill both hans and william you shall meet this desire”

would say “Sometimes you just have to burn all your bridges and just swim across the river” as one bird carried a match.

“Life or death?” Who asked this question. A ghost? A stranger behind these bushes?

when they came back he had left like the wind blowing out the last candle.

the sun hides behind clouds/afraid of shining on shadows/that’s where i’ll hide my longings and sorrows/our secret darkness

No one notices the Wabbit, sneaking into to Helgas lab, Pouring black liquid into the boiling potions uncared cup…

Will this dark unsacred actWILL change THEpotions good effect?Once THEbirds DOtaste their share..HANs sing SOLO:Wish I wereTHERE!

song (deriv) Iris: “Twitter and be fey, Let us seize the day Here we are let’s dance, We must take a chance in the tweet ballet.”

“Twitter and be fey, We must seize the day; Here we are in London town, Girl and boys and birds around, in such a tiny plot.”

The desert has no master and that’s like life without the laughter here I go watch as I fade away!!!

“Twitter and be gay, We have parts to play: We are come from cyberspace, To chill on Covent Garden’s place O isn’t it so droll.”

the desert has no master and thats like life without the laughter here I go watch as I fade away

Williams looks at the sun setting far from his tower – a distant jot of orange, tiny as a needle’s pin. – Content with his fate:

When last I saw his face / The universe was me / When last he spoke my name / I was all I was to ever be /

Now I am just a speck of light / only a spark in time / Now it’s a mere piece of dust / this empty life of mine /

A bringer of death / betraying my one true love / I have to pay the price / And be with Him above /

Oh… let me let go of me / Please… life! / Let me be / Let me be with angels now.

William steps up to the edge of the tower, closes his eyes, prepares to jump…

Up to no good: B-Cat: Boooooored! / Damn it! / I is dead, that’s why! / No mice to bite! No hunt to ride! /

Damn it! / Damn it! / Damn it! / I is dead, that’s I! / Curiousity kills a cat / Dead! / Ey! That’s no lie! Look at me…

I is dead! Oh, my, oh my! / And yet / livin’ or dead / fun can still be had / And I don’t mind. / Cause, I is dead. That’s why!

C-Cat: Cheer up! Our prey still lies within our claws. We will not let his struggling pause.

William closes his eyes, steps into the air, and beings to fall…

… and is transformed into a bird!

C-Cat & B-Cat: You cannot escape us / Our power is too great / Death is too easy / See your new fate!

(Bird William doesn’t yet know how to use his new wings, and flutters confusedly before landing on the ground.)

(But he is now noticed by Ginger Cat!)

Hans (from a tower window): Fly, dear William! Fly to me! Otherwise his prey you’ll be!

William: All I wish to do is to soar in the sky, to stretch my new wings, rise up and fly!

And William was bold and lived with no fear or regret, as seen above, story checks out.

Cat: Can I assist you, William? Or should this opera be retired?

(Earlier…) Hans, in the forest, lays down the (apparently useless) sword, looks around him. Wonders… Sings…:

When I die / will I / become nothing at all? / When I die / what will I be? / Will I become / next a fly / when I die? /

Or a tall tree? / What will I be? /Could I be / a butterfly / When I die? / When I die / what will become of me? /

What will become of me…/ When I die / will I be / never more? / Will I be gone? / A soul forelorn? / Am I just … me?

Where will I be?!! / Are we one / or are we not? / What’s our lot? / Why can’t I see? / Oh, why can’t I see? …

Suddenly, the sword ‘awakens’ and:

Yes! Hans! Why not indeed!? / Oh, my Hans, you know it all! / Every little bit! /

You’re just too dumb / to connect the dots / you stupid, foolish git! / You are me. / And I was you. / And all of us is us. /

And William’s dead / if you don’t move it now / your freckin’, blumin’ ass!

Why look to the heavens when they are blind to our plight?

I never loved her as a person. I just loved her for her looks. It is a sad realization that all men must come to.

a flash from the sword streaks towards William and he is surrounded by light.

William soars into the air, his wings strong and sure. He flies towards Hans, his arms outstretched

As they fall, we will rise, but why? Just for nothing?

“Once again, you stole from us

The cats burts into a duet as William rises, the melody mimicking William`s flight as they lament the loss of their prey

Helga realises that boys and birds are just a distraction in the life of a serious biochemist. She vows to become a nun.

“In nunneries, I have found / The provision of laboratories / Is superior to universities / I will leave these boys to play …”

“… with swords / And birds and bees / Squirrels and cats / For I have serious business to enact.”